AOII New Initiates (Emily is front row left)

I drove up to watch Emily perform in her first Jazz Ensemble group performance last night.  She has sung in high school and at church, but this was the first time I was going to watch her sing in college.  In the past, her father, sister and I were always her biggest fans and her cheering section.  But this event was different for in front of us and behind us were 20 of her AOII sisters. 

It was a moment that brought a tear to my eye for a whole host of emotions.  Just 3 weeks ago, Emily was initiated into her sorority and now has a bond with a family beyond our own biological one. Being an NPC sorority member myself, I know the awe and wonder of having your group’s secrets revealed to you and how special initiation is when you are finally a fully fledged member.  And even though her group is AOII and mine ZTA, we can still talk about our experiences without breaking our vows.  But she now has thousands of others with whom she shares a unique experience that I will never know.  As a parent it is in that moment, that you know your child is making life decisions that you so hoped for at 2, 5, 10, 15.   But now at 18 when it is all happening in front of me, it is a ball of pride and hope, with a little bit of angst and a tug on the heart that my daughter is growing up.

Within 2 weeks of being initiated, Emily was elected an officer of her chapter and is now serving as a Panhellenic Delegate.  All those qualities that we as parents had seen and hoped one day she would put to use, are now being put out to the world.  Her AOII family has made her one of their own and we are so grateful for her to have a place to fit in, to belong, to develop lifelong friendships and to most importantly learn about life and its opportunities to serve, lead, make a difference.  With pride and faith, her father and I are letting go so that she can make her mark, an impact in her world.

It was quite obvious that it has already begun when all those sisters stood and cheered, hugged and congratulated her, enveloped her in a big circle, and made her feel loved.

For an instant I wondered did she even know I was there.  My heart was reassured when she left the circle, gave me a big hug and whispered in my ear, “I love you Mommy”.

 Ah, my little girl is still in there!

New Initiates at Delta Gamma-Kappa Chapter, University of Nebraska-Lincoln

es over the years did not put me in that beautiful ritual until now, when I was able to participate as a mother of a new member.   Although Mary Claire suspected I would attend, I did my best to dissuade her expectation using her little brother’s varsity football game as my alibi.  She was not aware that I was present until that very moment when I stepped forward to place my own badge on her during the ceremony.

Earlier that evening, when I arrived at the chapter house to prepare, I was taken to a room where other alumni gathered.  I was stunned to be reunited with three sorority sisters I lived with in college, all of whom had a daughter or special family friend being initiated along with MC!  Who knew?!  What a wonderful surprise and I certainly did not expect all the recollections of undergraduate sorority life to flood back so quickly. It was a loving reminder that being a member of a sorority is truly enduring;  a thread of friendship and love that exists in a constant way throughout one’s life.

Amidst a few shed tears, hugs, and laughter, the experience made a memory for both mom and daughter and I am so glad I took the time to be present. I highly recommend participating in your daughter’s initiation if you are blessed to have pledged the same sorority. Even the young women who had special family friends attend were pleasantly surprised and grateful, making the ceremony all the richer for everyone.  If you are not members of the same sorority, or perhaps not even a fraternity/sorority initiate, you can still participate by sending a congratulatory letter, gift or phone call and by being a great listener when your daughter, in her excitement, wants to share of her experiences and new found friendships in her sorority life along the way…

Mary Claire with her pledge family on initiation eve.

If you would like to send flowers, the 26 NPC organizations’ flowers, colors, and history are located at npcwomen.org.  A card or phone call would be a welcome alternative to congratulate any new initiate.